What I would do Chapter
by Sai Kunai Blade
Summary: There's so many things you see in movies and TV that I would do differently if I were the character doing some of these things. Or if I were just an extra in the scene or a replacement for the actual character. Here are some of the many examples.
1. Arkham Asylum

After kicking the asses of a great many Arkham Inmates, I continued after Joker. I eventually found him on top of some giant holding…. Thing. "Oh, well, you finally arrived! Have some fun with this guy then." The Joker said, releasing a monster as big as Bane (yes, I'm not sticking to the original script, but A: I don't have time, B: I don't care).

"Oh, this is going to be fun." I said, stepping into fighting stance.

The thing let out a screech, then came barreling at me. I rolled out of the way and tried to attack him a few times, but it was doing next to nothing to him. At that moment, he swung his arm at me and sent me flying.

"Oh, dammit! It's just like fighting a thug from Dead Island. Oh, son of a bitch, that thing has a right hook!" I said, slowly getting back up.

All of a sudden, the thing looked like it was having a complete mental breakdown and fell to the ground, dead. "Well, that was unexpected. Not to self, need stronger test subjects." Joker said, holding his face and looking at me. "Oh, well, seeing as how I'm feeling generous, I'll give you this one for free." He said, walking to the edge of the thing he was standing on, opening his arms out wide. "Knock me off. I dare you! End this, pull the plug, stop me once and for all." He laughed.

I gave a look of consideration at that, then smiled. "Okay." I said, grabbing a metal pipe from off the ground and throwing it at him, hitting him in the face and knocking him down.

"Oh, what the hell!?" He shouted as he fell down.

"Hey, you asked." I smirked, going off to solve the rest of the problems at the asylum.


	2. Metal Gear Rising Revengeance

(this is what Raiden should've done instead of standing idly by like he did to save N'mani)

After I boarded the train, I finally reached the section where that piece of shit took N'mani was, along with N'mani himself and some guy with a ponytail. "Prime minister!" I said in shock.

"Heh. Too little, too late, hero." The guy smirked, looking back to N'mani, putting one of those giant machetes of his up to N'mani's throat, then turned it up to cut his chin.

"Stop!" I said, rushing in, not waiting for him to start cutting the Prime Minister. As I rushed, the guy with the ponytail swung his sword at me, but instead of jumping back and losing ground, I slid under the sword (what, you're telling me Raiden could jump back, but he couldn't just as easily slide under it? He slid under a door falling about as fast and still made it, why not here) then I jumped next to him, between him and N'mani and quickly slashed his side. He'd recover, but it was enough of a wound to stall him. From there, I cut the chains holding N'mani and grabbed him, getting ready to jump off the train "Hold on tight, Prime Minister!" I told him, jumping off, then when I landed, I used the clawed part of my feet to latch us in place and prevent us from rolling. "You're safe now. I'll get them for what they've done, thought." I told him, looking back at the train.

(also later, after I killed Sundowner, I would've SEPARATED the swords instead of keeping them together so I could swing them much easier and not take forever and a day for one swing.)


	3. Asura's Wrath

(this is one of the chapters I will be just a random little add-in to voice my two-sense, so don't overthink it.)

Asura, Yasha and I just defeated Vlitra and went back to the Brahmastra to get Mithra and just as her and Asura were just about to be tearfully reunited with happy endings all around, Olga suddenly rose up from... some.. platform that must've been behind Mithra, I don't know.

"So, you made it back- All of you." She said, before giving Mithra a smug glare, putting her hand on the girl's shoulder as she tried to run to us. "I'm very happy to see you all in one piece..." She said, giving us a dark grin before turning her attention back to Mithra, putting the back of a sword blade to her throat. "If you had lost to Vlitra, who would I exact my revenge on?" She asked.

(Why didn't Mithra run over here as soon as Yasha thought something was off? Seems to me like you run BEFORE you see the danger if you know it's there or coming. And where did Olga even come from? Wasn't she on another ship? Oh well, better question...) I thought. "You couldn't just push her hand off?" I asked in the sarcastic "really?" tone.

"She grabbed her!" Asura snapped, glaring at me.  
"Yeah, but it's not that hard to do this:" I said, grabbing Yasha's hand, setting it on my shoulder, then casually shrugged it off.  
"What about this?" Yasha asked slightly annoyed, grabbing my shoulder with a little bit of pressure.

"I can think of three ways: ducking a little to slip under your hand and dash away, shrugging your hand off a little harder than before or this." I said, wheeling my arm around and throwing his off my shoulder.

"Enough being a smartass!" Asura shouted, grabbing me by the throat and getting ready to smash my face in.

"DADDY don't hit Mommy, DADDY don't hit Mommy." I said quickly, shaking my head.

"How dare you ignore me!" Olga screamed as Asura let go.

At that moment I stepped forward a little. "Okay, Olga, let's just think about this for a moment: We just killed VLITRA, the source of all Gohma, the will of the very planet. How likely is it you would beat us. Besides, we both know what happened when you pissed Asura off before. That was only from killing a girl who LOOKED like his daughter. If you kill the real deal, I think Hell hath no fury like that. He would kill you within seconds, or drag it out to be as painful as possible." I explained.

"I do not care! Lord Deus was everything to me! As long as Lord Deus was alive, nothing else mattered!" She saidm sounding pained, then started weeping. "But, he is gone... I will never see him again!" She sobbed.

"Okay, let's think of that. You're mourning a ROYAL asshole. After Yasha betrayed you the first time, he let it slide and when you tried to argue, he threw you into a FUCKING WALL and electrocuted the hell out of you. He treated you like DIRT. And if you kill Mithra now, that's only gonna prove you're even more of a psychotic bitch. But one more thing and this is really important." I said.

"What?!" She demanded, glaring at me.

At this point, in the same reaction I gave Mithra earlier, I dropped my shoulders slightly and tilted my head with the "really?" look again. "You've got the BACK of the blade to her throat, stupid." I said.

"What?" She said, looking down, giving Asura enough time to rush forward and crush her face.

"This is why I'm the guy you call in during hostage situations." I said, nodding my head.


End file.
